Let me count the ways I loathe thee

Bristol airport. Having popped by a couple of times in the last month (Im very jet set doncha know), Ive remembered how much I cannot stand the place. Now don't get me wrong I know pretty much all airports are a nightmare, especially with all the security checks these days; but Bristol. Well its just a special kind of awful.

Firstly Im pleased to note that they have dropped the 'international' from the title. A glorified cattle shed that flys to gurnsey and the canaries if you are lucky, probably shouldnt have tried to rise quite so much above its station.

One risk with the airport is that you might not actually get to fly anywhere at all. I once read somewhere that Lulsgate Bottom was used by the RAF in the war as a training area due to its bad weather record. I may have made that up but it does make sense as someone only has to sneeze in Bishopsworth and suddenly there are gale force winds and gone are your dreams of sunbathing in the algarve.

Fortunately these last couple of occasions I have been lucky enough to make it off the runway so I must not complain. My real beef for the latest encounter with the place is the down right rudeness of the security staff. Now I'm not saying that I want a hug as I pass through security, though inevitably I do usually get some form of unwlecome touching as the fillings in my teeth or something as minor will usually set off the security sensor. I would just like a bit of politeness thats all. I do not wish to be barked at when (ridiculously) the clear plastic bag I have thoughtfully placed my liquids in does not happen to be, (in the opinion of the miserable bint on the desk), 'clear' enough (I kid you not). Nor do I wish to be fleeced £1 for four plastic bags the Im forced to buy from the machine that is clearly there only to make extra revenue. Is it not enough that I have to take out a mortgage to buy a coffee in the cafe?

I understood that the purpose of the plastic bags were that security could check the liquids as the passed through the control area. So I am at a loss as to why I need to buy bags when clearly my liquids have now all been checked? Maybe Im just being thick? Maybe the 'regulation' bags will actually all protect us from Osama bin laden. Perhaps thats why they are £1.

anyway... I shall go, as whilst I could go on to complain about the fact they have also now moved duty free so that you are forced to walk through it on the way to departures like its ikea or even the fact it takes four years for someone to turn a baggage carosel on when you land again. I am tired and I want my tea. I therefore bring this whinging to a close.

Good night all :) x

Its what you do with it that matters :)

Check it out. Its our new tent for Lowlands festival in August. The festival I am not allowed to get excited about until I have finished my exams ( incidentally which are tomorrow afternoon and friday). Now I hope you will agree that the size of the tent is most impressive. In fact so impressive I've booked the Arctic Monkeys to play in it on the last night of the festival (haha).

My knowledge for my exams... not so impressive unfortunately, but never mind. In other really dull news Ive got an eye test tomorrow too - another exam Ill be failing no doubt! Oh well I've always thought a white stick and a guide dog would finish off my look. :)

Well Id best be off. I worry if I concentrate on anything else for too long bits of information will fall out of my head. Which would be bad as there isnt a lot in there as it is

See you on the other side for the official start to the summer!

Dawn

On a river of red red wine :)

Evening all :)

Its been a while since I have rambled a bit on here so I thought Id pop in!

Its fair to say Ive been a little bit stressed of late and have not been administering my life as I should be. Im thinking now the clocks have gone forward and the days are longer perhaps this is an incentive to get a grip!

Today I arrived at work one hour late as I had forgotten it was thursday. (I go to college on thursday and therefore work different hours) Instead of my law books, I had thoughtfully chosen to bring my ice skates with me. Now as impressive as my skating is I don't think its quite what my lecturer had in mind for todays lesson...saying that he would have been better off with my attempts at backwards crossovers than he was with my opinion on public interest immunity....one out of 5 indeed...how very dare he!

So yes today was a bit of a mess think I may have to spring clean my house catch up with my homework, work out my ten year career plan, organise the wedding and generally regain control of the plot...

yes...Ill do that after I have finished with this wine and galaxy chocolate...Who wants an organised life anyway, its nowhere near as fun :)

so I leave you with the wisdom of the cat empire :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgkHd6eBfoE

Peggy

http://bluntcard.com/compose.php?imageid=450

Love this!

happy valentines day for Sunday

Its glorified rounders and thats final

What to do what to do..January blues are here! Im feeling very tetchy for no good reason.

This is also making me a lot more blunt...Now thinking back I remember a day when I was nice, polite, friendly and sociable...ok I take that back I was never any of those things but Im sure that I was a lot less brutal.

Take yesterday for example. I was in my public law class and ended up (inadvertently mind you) calling one of my classmates a public schoolboy w*nker. Now it actually wasn't aimed at him but when I did realise he had taken that it was.. did I apologise and take it back? No did I b*llocks! I let it hang there in the air (as inside I laughed heartily to myself).

Trouble is I've discovered the one thing over the years that what amuses me most about life are the awkward moments. I absolutely loved the office when it was on TV but I forget that not everyone finds that sort of thing funny.

But is it me?...or is the rest of the world just too sensitive?

Perhaps there is a new years resolution there...be nice to my fellow man (even the public schoolboys with a penchant for cricket)

Lets waste time....stealing cars:)

For me it has not been the best start to 2010. Im actually thinking of taking 2010 back and demanding a refund.

My mum will probably say its because I didn't take the christmas tree down on time. To which I say hush mother...and raise my middle finger :)

Firstly my (not that old) bath has a crack in it. Its not leaking yet but its only a matter of time. Rob is unconvinced at my theory that everything will be fine if we just smother the bottom in poxy resin. But to that I repeat the sentiments previously directed at my mother!

That in itself is annoying but not the end of the world. Following the bath issue I proceeded to lose not one, not two...but actually three pairs of my glasses. Well I say my glasses. One pair was Robs...I think he wants to poxy resin me to the bottom of the bath now.

Again...annoying yes...but the piece de resistance was (while looking for said glasses) I managed to lock my keys in the boot of my car. It wouldn't been to bad had it not been for three things:

1) I do not own a spare key.

2) I am not a member of a breakdown organisation

3) I was parked in a multi-story car park in the centre of town with no other means of getting home.

A very angry Rob (who at this point wanted to poxy resin me to a grand piano and push it off a cliff) and I decided that the only option was to break into my car. Given that neither of us took GCSE car crime at school we didn't really know where to start. (I gather they ran the course at my school judging by the amount of my ex classmates who took up a career in the field...unfortunately I took media studies)

As I had not planned for an evening of grand theft auto I had unfortunately left my crow bar, screw driver, drill, coat hangers & dynamite (for blowing the bloody doors off) at home. So Rob went off to find something blunt and heavy and I went off to find a security guard to explain what we were going to do.

I couldn't find a security guard/policeman/neighbourhood

watch busybody or anyone who gave a monkeys so returned to find Rob brandishing a large brick and deliberating over which window to put it through.

At this point I felt sad however as I was muttering apologies to my precious motor, Rob went for a his first strike. We then discovered that the windows in a ford ka are a lot stronger than they look as it just bounced off! I sighed a sigh of relief and thought that wont work then - we will have to try something else... I had barely finished thinking this when out of the corner of my eye I saw Rob sprinting towards the car with a crazed look in his eye (It might have been my imagination but Im sure I head him do a war cry). This time the window had no chance and in seconds it was snowing cubes of glass.

So what happened then? Were we swooped upon by the rozzers and arrested? Did the car park 'lock down' trapping us in there like the dirty criminals we looked like? Did anyone even care? In a word no. As the window smashed some people in the distance actually cheered and that was it?! I mean what the hell is the world coming to.

So there you have it. Grab yourself a brick, choose a car you like and take a run up. The sad truth is that Probably nobody will stop you.

Shocking!

Anyway so here is the aftermath! Happy new year!